The 10th anniversary edition of the classic guide to handling life's toughest conversations. What is a difficult conversation? Asking for a pay rise, saying 'no' to your boss or spouse, confronting a friend, apologizing. We all have conversations that we dread and find unpleasant. But can we develop the skills to make such situations less stressful and more productive? Based on fifteen years of research and consultations with thousands of people, Difficult Conversations pinpoints what works. It teaches us to work through them by understanding that we're not engaging in one dialogue but three: - The "what happened" conversation (what do we believe was said and done) - The "feelings" conversation (the emotional impact on everyone involved) - The "identity" conversation (what does this mean for everyone's opinion of themselves) Use this ground-breaking, step-by-step book to turn your difficult conversations into positive, problem-solving experiences.